LOVE SECRETS...SEASON 5.

SECRET #14: TOUCH. 

Touch your partner. Very often. 

Not necessarily intimate,high-definition squeezing...

A simple hug,a hand on the shoulder,a warm handshake,a poke at the ribs...can achieve the same purpose. 

Touch is a very efficient and natural way of communicating affection,care,trust and love.

Babies who are touched and carried look healthier than those who are touched less.

Touch is more than a sense...

It is a language,a tool,a gift.

Touching someone says one thing:I am one with you. 

In other words,we are the same...I love you. 

This explains why in a caste system, some are regarded as 'untouchables'. 

Touch is a great leveller...and a gap-bridger.  

Sometimes,distance may make touch impossible. 

What do one do? 

Get a picture or frame of your loved one. 

Keep it in a visible place and touch it from time to time. 

It communicates part of the feeling. 

So,are you in love with someone? 

Don't just look...

Touch.

SECRET #15: DON'T BE SO QUICK TO JUMP SHIP! 

So the relationship is no longer as rosy as it was in this beginning.

And there is this new,smoking-hot person catching your fancy. 

Compared to this new person,your current partner looks out-classed. Worn-out. Dreary. 

And you want to bolt.  

Hmmm...Be very careful. 

Truth is that after the initial months or maybe a year of starting a new relationship,everything may become normal and to some,boring. 

Some may abandon the now-boring relationship for a new adventure leaving a string of break-ups along the way. 

This is the recipe for an unfulfilled life and ultimately,disaster. 

 In love, patience is key. 

Just as your parents stood by you from your infancy till now that you are fully grown.

In love,a lot of time is spent on 'stand-by'. 

If your two-year relationship is now boring,maybe you are the one lacking in creativity.

Re-invigorate it. 

Do new things with your partner. 

But don't just run away. 

If your partner is abusive and incorrigible

And has exhausted many 'second chances'

You can leave. 

But make sure that this new,smoking-hot person asking you out 

Is not just another flash in the pan. 

SECRET #16: TEACH...AND BE TEACHABLE! 

Love is not just a playground...it is a learning field. 

It is an experience that should change your life and broaden your world view. 

Find something you can teach your partner...something meaningful. 

How to cook. 

A language. 

How to be more organised. 

How to relate better with people. 

How to play an instrument. 

How to be more caring. 

How to give. 

How to save. 

How to love...the list is endless. 

 Be Teachable...no one knows it all. 

Express willingness to learn at every opportunity. 

And apply everything you learn.

It iis not only good for you...it thrills your partner! 

If both of you teach and are teachable

Then your love will not just be a bucketful of 'I love you's or a carton-load of kisses. 

It will be something concrete.

LOVE YOURSELF.

In a country where love is preached in every street corner and even from rooftops, everything around us bear imprints of hatred and animosity: broken homes, burnt churches, decapitated bodies, abandoned children, ravaged lands.
The irony bears testimony to one truth: We have not learnt to love.

Not our neighbour and surely not God.

We just enjoy talking and singing about 'love'.

In learning how to love,there is no better place to begin than from within.'Charity',they say,'begins at home.'

And we've been told to love our neighbours as we love ourselves.

So for a start: Love yourself.

Most of us hate ourselves.

This is a truth many deny persistently. If not,how can we explain the palpable frustration on most people's faces? 

Or self-deprecating remarks like 'I'm stupid...I'm a big fool'?

Or the rising prevalence of depression and suicide attempts?

Why will you wish to be someone else if you love yourself?

Huh?

Granted some things about you may not be superb.

You may not have wads of loose cash to spend or have the height or size of your dreams.

But so what?

Love yourself.

Appreciate your uniqueness and what sets you apart.

It is a testament of the wonderful nature of your being.

And remember,you are a co-creator.

So if your circumstances ain't right, go and create the ideal circumstances!

Work hard and make more money.

Get a degree.

Exercise daily till you get that trim body.

Change what you can,enjoy what you can't.

It is quite true that many of us have made terrible mistakes in the past.

And done many things we are not proud of.

But still I urge you: Love yourself.

Those mistakes are necessary components of your life story.

Believe me, unpalatable as they may seem, they've made your life interesting.

And here's the good news: They've been locked away in your past now.

You future does not depend on them, it depends on your present.

So dear, love yourself...

Now.

Loving yourself does not mean lying sprawled on the sofa sixteen hours daily watching TV.

Loving yourself doesn't mean emptying your bank account and spending everything today.

NO!!! 

Loving yourself means appreciating every moment of your existence and developing yourself to full capacity.

Loving yourself means being joyful and happy and passing the same joy and optimism to others.

Loving yourself means recognizing your unique role to humanity and striving to fill it.

Loving yourself means seeing yourself as part of a whole and doing your best to preserve that whole.

If we learn to truly love ourselves, our eyes will be opened.

Then,we can look sideways and love our neighbour.

And together, we will all look up, and come to love our God...the epitome of love.